2020 was a year probably most of us will choose to forget. Filled with unexpected twists and turns, some of them gut-wrenching from a psychological point of view, some so stressful they led to broken marriages and disrupted families and sadly innumerable physical destruction, both as a direct result of the COVID-19 virus or through stress and the inability to cope.
There are millions of people on the planet whose lives have been totally disrupted, they have lost loved ones, jobs businesses and worst of all even family members, so how on earth do we go into another year that currently promises more of the same, with a positive, constructive mind-set?
Well, I’m that irritating ‘glass half full’ person that believes we can if we choose to – so if you’re willing to try, these are four important questions you need to answer to ensure you will enter 2021 with a mind-set that will serve you well…
What did 2020 make you feel?
Yes, the old Psychoanalyst’s question ‘how did that make you feel?’ is an important one. It is essential that we are honest about this and don’t do what so many do and say “Well it is what it is” and sweep it under the carpet.
For heaven’s sake, many of us were for the first time were made to realise that we are not really in control of our own lives. We were merrily going about our business when ‘wham!’ the rug was pulled out from under us and we were all forced into a state of compromise and acceptance of something bigger than all of us.
That is pretty shattering in itself – so I ask again “How did it make you feel?” Angry, hopeless, scared, terrified, and bitter? Or maybe you were a little relieved that you were given something of a change from the humdrum of normality?
Maybe you were happy with spending more time at home and did some fun stuff together with the family. Maybe you learned to cook, or garden, or read more. Yes, if you think about it, it probably it wasn’t all bad. So that’s the good stuff you must own now, pack it in your 2021 rucksack and take it with you.
How can you release the bad stuff?
Having decided to take some of the positive aspects of 2020 with you, now you need to release the things that were holding you back and stifling you in that time.
Usually, this is primarily an acceptance of change. Prolific American author Joseph Campbell said, “We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
Accept that things do change and we have to change with them. Those most affected by what happened in 2020 were those with the most resistance to change. Those who embrace change immediately searched for alternate lifestyles, businesses and better ways of communication.
What do you choose to feel in 2021?
I love this quotation from Isabel Gillies, Author of ‘Happens Every Day: An All Too True Story’ – “I believe in love. I believe in hard times and love winning. I believe marriage is hard. I believe people make mistakes. I believe people can want two things at once. I believe people are selfish and generous at the same time. I believe very few people want to hurt others. I believe that you can be surprised by life. I believe in happy endings.”
It is not that anything she says is profound, but it is refreshingly honest. The reality is that we only find freedom when we can be true to our own feelings – and we own these thoughts, so choose what you want to feel in 2021. Receive the hand you are dealt with gratitude – at least you’re still in the game!
How will you receive whatever it brings?
So, how will you receive whatever 2021 is going to dish up? Will you be more prepared this time if 2021 isn’t what we hope it will be? Are you ready now to accept that the world inside us is not necessarily the world around us?
Life is a balance. Maybe 2021 will be more of the same but it will just mean more light at the end of a longer tunnel. Whatever the outcome, it will change eventually – as does everything else.
An attitude of gratitude
Prepare your entry into 2021 with an attitude of gratitude for all the blessings you have – and try to have a balanced life – there should always be time for you – and equal time for the other.
To be balanced, lead a life that encompasses a holistic approach – including body, mind and soul, to finally experience the Self and More!
I am always there for you – and truly grateful for your support and what I have learned from you this year. I sincerely wish you all a blessed festive season and happiness and prosperity in 2021 – Whatever it may bring!